Why can’t I ever stick to anything! ARGH! Ok so I wasn’t really bad … wait who am I kidding I was bad. But not as bad as I could have been.

So today is day 4 and I woke up feeling pretty hungry but not wanting a shake, the thought made me gag. So I ate some diet jelly (which is on my allowed foods list) and then had a shake. Come lunch time I was starving, I needed carbs and was pretty cranky! So I made a packet pasta and ate it. Full of carbs and fat. I was determined not to blow it to the extreme and have a shake for dinner … but hmm I went to the shop looking for low carb chocolate and walked out with sugar free lollies and REAL dark chocolate … not a small bar, but a whole block! (As I tyoe this I have eaten half of it already).

So I went home and ate half and then cooked chicken and vegies for dinner.

Why do I do it? Why can’t I stick to anything? GRRRR I want to slap myself! I guess this is why banding is my last option, this is why I am so overweight!

I can never break a diet a little, when I break it I go all out! So today was actually good for my normal standards, but still not great. I just don’t cope with no carbs very well.

So tomorrow is 7 days before the surgery and I need to be better! I need to stick to my plan (2 shakes and one meal per day).

I need to get out of the house tomorrow, a whole day at home today has made me feel a little blah! So I am going to take my little boy on a picnic to the park at lunch time. Maybe some walking and fresh air will clear my head and give me a new perspective on this whole diet thing! Here’s hoping anyway!

Oh P.S. I have lost 1.5 kilos this week! So something is working!