7 days! ONLY 7! I am actually not sure how I feel. Nervous, excited, happy, scared …. nope …. I feel a little numb. I know it’s happening next week but I just really can’t believe it! I can’t believe that I will be changing my life next Thursday!

This is not like the excitement of starting a diet where I know after 2 weeks I will fail. This is a change of life that WILL make me lose weight! That I will suceed with and that is the thing I am struggling to wrap my head around. I have been on so many diets over the years that I am sure if you mention one I have tried it! All of them have failed …. wait no …. I have failed all of them. I hate saying they failed because diets work if you stick to them! But that is what I can’t do! LOL

So trying to wrap my head around the fact that my life is changing is a little hard and I guess it is why sticking to these shakes is so difficult, because the surgery and the results of the surgery seem so surreal!

I really can’t believe in the near future I will be able to go into a store that I love! Not just stand outside and drool on the windows! I will actually be able to walk in knowing they stock my size and feel confident and actually BUY something! In all honesty I have not stepped foot in a store other than Target for about 5 years I walk past the stores I love and look through the windows wishing and hoping there is a new sign saying “we stck super large fat sizes now!” But it never happens. So I keep walking and head to Target to the plus sized section and buy boring tent clothes to hide my expanding figure.

Clothes are a huge thing for me. I love fashion, I read fashion magazines and would love to be able to dress trendy again rather than wearing the same things over and over and dressing like a 55 year old women! Ahh this dream is going to be a reality very very soon! That excites me!

So this time next week will be being admitted to hospital and the real journey begins!